Friday, May 28, 2010

You Are What You Choose To Be

Dear Ms J,

Today you returned everything I gave you. Well, almost. I still don't have those emotions, those feelings, and love, and concern that I had for you. Those sleepless nights, that endless trust. I still haven't got them back. And I probably never would, because however much you try you would not be able to find them in someone else.

Today I did something that I have never before and probably would never do it again. I walked off without even listening to what you had to say. But I did it for a purpose Ms J, simply being rude with you was not the idea. Although I am sure you wouldn't understand it. Because you were never that intelligent to understand my silence. You always mistook my it for my weakness.

What I did today was to make you understand that you are not the only one who can be rude, that you are not the only person in this world who can show attitude, that you are not the only one who can be arrogant for no reason. I could have done that to you too. But I chose not to, for the sole reason that I love you. And I believe that you always become what you choose to be in life. Like I chose to be your pillar of strength. Even though you didn't leave a single stone unturned to break me down into pieces so small that I am still trying to find myself from my scattered ashes. But I still stood by your side, always. Because I chose to.

I don't know whether you would read this or not, but if you do then I would like to make one thing very clear. I love you, like I always did. Inspite of what you did to me and how you behaved with me, I still love you like crazy. And I would always go on loving you, till then end of time. And all of these because I choose it to be so.

Wish you all the happiness in life.

Love, hugs and kisses,

P.S. Now you are tied to me for the rest of your life. Poor poor you, Ms J!

6 Comment:

Anonymous said...

Can you say bitter....

Robin said...

That's a pretty intense letter. The statement is true though... we choose who, how and what we want to be. It takes strength beyond what some people are willing to exert.

C'est La Mode said...

Deeply passionate?strong-willed? yeah I agree with what robin had said that it takes courage/ strength beyond what some people are willing to exert. We chose who, how and what we want to be, exactly!

Anonymous said...

I just found your post 3 hours ago, and i have reading ever since. I am thoroughly addicted. I am been reading from the new posts to the oldest so as i have reached here, i have read quite a lot. I just want to tell you, that even if i don't know you personally but seem like an amazing person. Your thoughts, your views, your emotions mirror mine. Many a time i have wondered about that, so i have stopped believing in too. Life doesn't always give you what you want but we have to deal with it. I really understand what you mean. And i don't sat this for many people but, you are NOT weird, abnormal or just too mushy gushy. You are human, loving and caring. And i haven't seen any guy who cares as much as you do. Maybe, it was good she isn't here because you deserve more. Hopefully, you will find that soon. :D

Lots of good wishes and blessings, Nandita :D

Rajtilak Bhattacharjee said...

@Nandita: if you might have noticed, this post was written a long time back and so doesn't reflect what i am going through in my life right now. she is there with me, and with all your prayers hope we would be able to live happily ever after. wish i could know the name of your blog, but i don't think it would be possible anymore. still, thanks for your wishes and blessings.

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